Stop Having Sex With Black People

I have noticed a trend of white people who like to have sex with black people never actually show their solidarity with black people when shit gets real. It’s like they can fuck us unapologetically but can’t stand up and speak out for us unapologetically. Frankly, I’m sick of it. I’m sick of seeing my white friends with mixed babies ignoring the racist realities of this country that are plaguing the black community. I’m sick of white people fetishizing black bodies when they’re laying up with them and then continuing to objectify black bodies as they lay bleeding in the streets due to a trigger happy racial profiling cop by justifying that officer’s actions. Or just completely ignoring the tragedy altogether.

I am tired of white men expressing their attraction to me but then getting uncomfortable when I start discussing race relations. You don’t get the luxury of trying to sleep with me and telling me what I can and can’t talk about. Fuck being “colorblind.” Colorblindness is a dangerous and oppressive concept that us black people don’t get to enjoy the privilege of experiencing. We have to be on guard at all times because the color of our skin can become our death sentence. It disturbs me how someone can be unashamed to be in a relationship with a black person or produce children with them but be ashamed to post or share anything pertaining to the ongoing mistreatment of blacks in this country.

What could possibly be so difficult about acknowledging police brutality and racism? Or better question, why is it so simple to condemn and criticize those who speak out against it? So you can hop in bed with a black person but can’t post #BlackLivesMatter one time for the gram? How infuriating and insulting this is. Also, for the record, sleeping with a black person and having mixed kids doesn’t mean you aren’t racist.

Get familiar with racial microaggressions. Real quick. Real fucking quick. 

You are part of the problem because of your blatant disregard to our plight and your children’s plight. Yes your children are biracial/mixed but will ultimately be seen as black. Stop raising those babies to not want to identify with the people they will be associated with by default. You’re creating more people who will stand for black oppression when you do that. More people who are anti-black. More people who will associate blacks with negative stereotypes. We don’t wan’t nor need those. We need more Jesse Williams’s.

If you have no interest in taking down white supremacy and eradicating racism, please for the love of God, stop fucking us!

Ladies, You Do Not Have To Settle For A Man You Are Only Content With

As women we tend to seek out partners who we feel can meet our basic needs. Who can provide, respect and love us. We want a partner who we can be content with. Is being content enough though? Shouldn’t our ideal man have us feeling overjoyed? Being content to me means settling and not being fully satisfied. When we settle we deprive ourselves from we what we truly need. From what we truly want. We deprive ourselves from meeting our emotional and sometimes, even our physical needs.

When we settle for a partner who doesn’t make us smile and laugh as much as we know we can, it can lead us to feeling bored and maybe even depressed. Even angry. We may find ourselves lashing out and becoming the woman we told ourselves we wouldn’t. We should choose someone who excites us and goes out of their way to keep us smiling. Someone who we believe to be the funniest man in the world, even if only we believe it. Someone who who can please us in every way and who wants to please us in every way.

We also need to stop settling for a man who is unemotional just because we convince ourselves we can deal with it. It will not last. It will not last with anyone so you can stop only staying because you don’t him to be with anyone else. Men like that aren’t programmed for monogamy. They do not understand the importance of creating and maintaining a strong loving bond with another person. Do not waste your time trying to prove to yourself you can change him. You can’t. Only he can and sadly he probably won’t.